I just want to write a little something about something had I have begun to realize recently. OK. So, I say short, but if you know me, this will end up really really long. :) Nothing is ever short in my life. Ha!
Anyways. We all have the ups and downs right? We have our good days and bad days. We have those days where we feel like we could overtake a city for Christ and other days where we feel like nothing in the Kingdom. We have those days where just feel the love of Jesus and we feel Hiis presence and other days where we feel empty and we don’t feel Him. Can I get an Amen? (the crowd: AMEN!) Alright. But let’s look at David for a minute.
I really like David. He was said to be a man after God’s own heart. But he says some crazy things! I mean when he is being attacked and and the enemy encamps against him, he will turn at the end of the psalm and say Blessed be the Lord. At other times he is just telling the Lord all of His grief and pain but still say I trust you or something. You have heard my cry. You see what I’m saying? In the midst of His struggle, he still says I give thanks to the Lord. I worship the Lord with all my heart. You said seek My face and your face Lord will I seek. The Lord is faithful in all his works. At those times, I don’t think he was always “feeling” it. He had people mocking him, abandoning Him, and he saw his own iniquity. Do you think he always “felt” like the Lord was being faithful? Or heard his cries? ect… I love Ps 73. In vs 12-22 he says “when my souls was embittered, when I was pricked at heart, I was brutish and ignorant; I was like a beast toward you.” Do you ever feel like that? Yet right after he says “Nevertheless, I am continually with You; You hold my right hand…Whom have I in heaven but You? And there is NOTHING on earth that I desire besides You. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.” That’s crazy! He was so confident in his place before the Lord despite how he felt or what circumstances were going on or what he had done.
I heard someone I think just recently say something about something David had said and how it came from his spirit. Sometime last week I guess it hit me in a certain way. Meaning: No I don’t think he always felt on top of the world, or felt like the Lord was hearing Him, or that the Lord saw the grief, the pain, the struggles He went through. Yet, in the midst of it all he still says but Lord you are faithful. I will give thanks to You forever. Blessed be the Lord my Rock. You are my refuge. You hide me in the shadow of Your wing. You preserve the Righteous. I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. On and on…How? When we hit a rough spot, when we struggle, when the enemy is just encamped all around us, sometimes we begin to question and wonder if the Lord is faithful. We begin to ask questions. Lord where are you? If you are faithful then why haven’t you shown up and done something. And we question ourselves. Am I really the righteousness of God? How can He delight in me? I can’t do anything right. I’m nothing in the kingdom. On and on.
I have heard ALL the time about not relying on your emotions. Don’t walk according to your emotions. Your emotions are not always true and can be manipulative and on and on. I get that. But I am an emotional person as far as I like to feel. Feel loved. Feel God. Feel Joy. ect. So in ways I am driven by my emotions. When I don’t feel God, it gets to me. I am made to feel God and feel his embrace and love. yet I know I won’t always and I know the enemy attacks. I know that when I don’t feel Him that it’s a red flag from the Lord probably saying that there is something in me that needs to be dealt with. There are the mountains and the valleys. But sometimes I just get frustrated with myself. Sometimes I do buy into the lies of the enemy even though I know truth. I don’t feel or see alot of the times what I know the Lord is saying about me and how He feels about me. And i begin to condemn myself which doesn’t make anything better. It makes it hard to stand and press through it standing on the word. It’s defeating and I will feed on the lies and emotions going deeper and deeper. Anyone get what I’m trying to say?
But hears the thing. First off, and we all need to resolve this in our hearts ( I have had to and still continuing to) Jesus does what He does because He is faithful. Period. Whatever it is. Even if it doesn’t make sense, He is doing what He is doing because He is faithful. Because He is committed to the process of changing and completing the work He has begun in you.
Next, this is exactly it: David could say that the Lord is good and blessed be the Lord and the Lord is faithful in the midst of war and struggling because what he said was not said out of his flesh but from his spirit. Your flesh is fallen. We know that. Alot of things you go through and feel doesn’t make sense. It doesn’t align alot of times with how we feel and what the truth is. We know one thing, but feel somthing totally opposite that rules our emotions and thoughts. I’m learning you can’t try and reconcile those two things alot of times. “I know your faithful but I’m feeling this”. “I know your faithful, but I’m having a hard time seeing it”. “I know your faithful but everthing else seems to say otherwise” Those type of thoughts cause you to question what you once new in the light as truth. I’m not saying your emotions are not real and I’m not saying that this is necessarily easy. I know it’s not from experience, but I’m beginning to learn how to stand in these times. I want to be unshakeable and immovable. Like David said “I have set the LORD always before me; because He is at my right hand, I shall not be shaken” (Psalm 16:8). I heard someone say this before. “Don’t doubt in the dark what was revealed to you in the lght.” The truth of God is consistent and never changing- no matter how you feel, no matter what you have done, and no matter the struggle.
Basically, all of that to say this. This whole principle goes along with denying yourself. In these situations, you must deny your flesh, your emotions, your doubt. Don’t give your flesh (or the enemy) that satisfaction of feeding onto lies and emotional deception. We must stop looking and thinking about scripture at times likes these with the flesh and natural eyes. We will sit down defeated every time. But be like David, quote the Truth from your spirit. I am the Righteousness of God. Jesus You are always faithful. I am seated in the heavenly realms. Jesus does love me and He does see me. Jesus is here and is near to me. Jesus has not forsaken me. Jesus has not abandoned me. Jesus delights in me. He grace is enough. I am forgiven. I am victorious. Everything around you may be going off saying otherwise. I’ve had times where I will try to stand and fight and as I begin to quote scripture and declare who the Lord is and who I am but emotions do haywire and wreck havoc. It just stirs up these emotions and thoughts that just begin to get stirred up and so i will quit and sit back down. Then I began to think. If that happens, then more than likely it’s the enemy. I know I am doing something right. So there are times where I will try and press on through that. One step at a time. You emotions may get stirred up screaming in opposition. Your mind may be going haywire. But it’s ok. You are not saying this from your flesh and your not dependent on your emotions, but you say this from your spirit and it is there that Truth is spoken forth. You know in your spirit that these things are true. Deny what you feel in your flesh by declaring the truth in your spirit.
I haven’t thought about all this much from the first time it ran through my mind- to be able to think it out to write until now. But I hope I made enough sense for you to get the point.
“For thus says the One who is high and lifted up, who inhabits eternity, whose name is Holy: ‘I dwell in the hight and holy place, and also with him who is of a contrite and lowly spirit, to revive the spirit of the lowly, and to revive the heart of the contrite.’ ” _ Is 57:15-16
I love that.